A ream of paper and an apple core

I have two weeks left of being 29. Are you kidding me? Life is going to happen...it's on! I don't know about a career. Everything I find myself dreaming of (MA in gender studies at U of Austin, PhD in counseling psych, stocker at Walmart) makes less sense than staying where I am, powering through to get my L. I'm so close to my thousand face to face hours, how can I speed up the other 3,000? I had the best day with Sparrow. She is just darling and even though I'm still having anxiety if I let myself think about how nursing feels, I have fallen back in love with her. She is my stinkable cozeable nubbly glick, my dainty cluck. We took a bath together, she followed me around cooing and hung onto my legs, she gently touched my nose and wanted to bite my fingers, she murmurs "Mama. Mahmee." I hummed into her neck and made her laugh. She is so special and dear. I went to Scera park to see my friends and it felt good to be there. I still don't want to speak about my Very Quiet Cricket.
I want Jonathan...he is gone on a survival trip for 5 days and I miss him so much. I thought it would be a good use of time to watch all the romcoms that Crystal has on plex, but all it did was give me all kinds of feelings and I have no one to talk to or snuzzle with. Just a few more days...this is the longest we've ever gone without speaking since we began speakng. I hope he is safe and stays safe. It hurts to miss any days with him. My biggest dreams now are to have a beautiful life  and travel with him and always be in love. I truly do love him.